there’s only one

Surely this is a fun brain tease, to invent new this, to discover one and only.

Petina Gappah

At a Harare café the other day, I was intrigued to hear an extremely well-toned and well-groomed blonde woman say, with all the confidence of the only one in Africa who does this, ‘I am the only person in Africa who does this.’ She and her companion moved away before I could find out what this was, leaving me in great suspense. I must confess that I have been obsessing over this this a little. Africa is so big, so vast, so incredibly ginormous. And yet this lady is the only one in the whole continent who does this.

What is this? Is she the only person in Africa who gives French pedicures to African poodles? The only person in Africa who eats her peas with honey, who has done it all her life, it makes the peas taste funny but it keeps them on the knife? The only person in Africa who does sudoku in a bath of vanilla milk and rose petals? The only person in Africa who eats her meals backwards, starting with dinner in the morning and ending with a nice continental breakfast in the evening? The only person in Africa who makes small scarves for bats?